So this morning...........such a hot, humid one! Our local weather says it is going to be a day for central air. I'm so thankful I have it in my car and in my home!!
On the way home this morning from my chiropractor appointment, I was feeling a bit discouraged...and a little anxious about this low back pain I've been experiencing off and on for the last month. I know I have arthritis in my lower back and I know I have a disk that can bulge like it did 2 years ago. I know this current problem is why I'm also being treated by him for the plantar faciitis. I know this chiro team is a good one because they helped to get me pain free and doing awesome fitness workouts before. But for some reason, this morning, I was most anxious and I don't get anxious all that often. When I do, though, it can be crippling and all these negative thoughts start running through my mind.
To combat this, I turned on the Christian radio station and the following song is what I heard:
and I became undone.
I started to cry!! In the car!! While driving!! I felt tears slipping out of my eyes and down my cheeks and I realized that even though I have been doing devotionals all summer and going to church quite regularly except when we were on vacation, that I have been holding on to this anxiety and not fully giving the worries and fears over to Christ. He wants to take them from me, but He doesn't force us!! We have to surrender....every part of our selves.
Between dealing with menopausal issues and this back pain, I am a mess of negativity!
And God doesn't want that for me!
He wants us to abide in Him...to surrender ALL to Him...every sin, every thought, every anxiety, every pain, every joy, every triumph, every trial.
I started praying aloud in the car and a sense of peace came over me.......a confidence that the chiropractor does indeed know what he is doing, but that God is even bigger than Dr. N.
That the upcoming ultrasound I have is going to be ok. That God will get me through that next week and that He has me in the Palm of His Hand. He made my body, he made my mind, he made my heart.
I will continue to worship Him and press in and surrender each day...........surrender those thoughts that are negative and do no earthly good.
And trust Him.
And trust Him.