Inner turmoil; thoughts jumbling and tumbling over and around and my mind going every which way.....who to believe? who to trust? who to unfriend? who to put boundaries around? who to embrace, who to pray for, who to blame........
I had a day like that once. It was during the pandemic of 2020. It was early Summer. July. A Sunday morning. A bit overcast from what I remember. Not too hot. No church in person. The world was in as much chaos as my thoughts were. I had received some information regarding a childhood abuse case I was in the midst of being a witness for and advocating for the person who had been victimized. Many of the people involved were friends of mine. I honestly didn't know who to trust, I only knew, based on my own experience and from teaching young children who had been victimized, that the person wasn't fabricating this horror. That it was real. Yet my thoughts were going every which way.
I was on my bike riding across town in the park where the bike path just goes for miles. I had stopped by the pond to rest and drink water. And that's when I saw the sun shining down on these beautiful wildflowers......flowers in the midst of weeds.
I raised my face towards the sun thinking of this Scripture....a blessing actually....a prayer.....some mainline churches use it as the ending to their service...a doxology so to speak. In fact, growing up in the Free Methodist church, as a child and teen I heard this almost every week from the pastor.
And as I raised my face towards the sun, I felt as though the Son was telling me "peace". Jesus came to bring peace. In fact, although this world, and every religion, people group and nation long for peace, we will never know true peace until we actually know God. Humans think of peace as being an end to war, to strife, to fighting, to abuses, to violence. But...there is always strife somewhere, there's always violence, and abuses, and fighting and wars. Just look at the history of this nation, this world.
Only God brings peace. Only Believers fully grasp and experience the "peace that passes all understanding." and how do we attain that perfect peace? By fully surrendering our worries, cares and anxiety on God. By giving thanks during prayer and then leaving our worries for Him to carry, fully trusting and believing that His face shines upon us. That is when we experience the peace the world just can't understand.
Today my mind was jumbled with different thoughts regarding extended family issues, trying to decide where to volunteer come Autumn now that I'm approaching the one year of retirement mark. It's been a year of much reflection on what's important to me and my family. On where and how to spend my time. On coping with chronic neck and head pain. It's been quite a year. But......
I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that my God shines His face on me because I look to Him and He is Light and Life. Yes, I still have trials and tumbling thoughts. But His face shines on me!!
and in that....there is Peace.
4 comments:
Hi Faith. I am so glad that I took a few minutes tonight to read this post! I am sure that God put this on your heart to write because I really needed to read it. I shared with you in the MP what I am really worried about and in conflict with my husband about. This devotional post seems like an answer to me. Thanks you for taking the time to write it. God bless you!
Yes, He is light and life and brings us peace when we open up to accept it. I am learning how to do that.
Such a well written post Faith.
He is our peace. Beautiful and a lovely reminder to turn to Him.
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