Victory!

The photo above was taken from an online gallery of Adirondack Winter Scenes.  This is Kane Mountain, in the southern Adirondacks, about 65 minutes from my house.  I have hiked this mountain once.  I did it as a day trip with my good friend (and neighbor), Melissa,  her 2 daughters, my 2 daughters, and my sister, Hope.  I will never forget the thrill of victory when we finally made it to the top. 

 It was not a long hike but it felt like it. It was a very humid, hot day with nary a breeze.  The hike itself was only about a mile to the summit yet it took longer than usual due to the fact that we had to keep stopping for water breaks.  We were drenched in sweat.  The girls were good sports because we promised them a swim in Caroga Lake once we were through.  We were only about 8 miles from the lake so they knew after hiking down to the car, it would be just a short ride to the cool, clear waters.  The anticipation of getting to the summit was inspiring for them because at the top is a fire tower!  And the views would be of most of the West Canada Valley  and southern region of the Adirondacks....a very remote section.  We couldn't wait to get to the summit! My oldest particularly loves fire towers, as do I.  And personally, I think, my sister, neighbor, and I couldn't wait just so we didn't have to hear much more whining about the heat.  It really was a hot July day.....almost too hot to hike.  We hadn't expected it to get quite that sticky...usually the mountains have cooler and less humid weather!

However....we didn't anticipate that the fire tower at the top would be closed. 

The cabin was still there, although very decrepit.  We could not climb the fire tower but the girls had fun exploring all around it.  I was just glad, as was Melissa and Hope, to sit on the large rocks and guzzle the rest of our water.  We felt victorious and happy that we made it to the top with just a little whining from the girls.....that bribe of a fresh water lake swim really helped!

Here is a picture from that time:

Front:  Meredith, Morgan, Courtney (age 13), Claire (age 7)
Back:  neighbor, Melissa; my sister Hope
Kane Mountain summit/cabin
July 2006

So why am I writing about a hot July day mountain climbing on a bitter cold winter afternoon??

Because of the word "victory"!  This morning, during my quiet time before church, I was reading in I John.  Here is the verse that jumped out at me:

"For whatever is born of God overcomes the world.  And this is the victory that has overcome the world----our faith.  Who is he who overcomes the world, but he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?"

I John 5:4 & 5

and I realized this morning, that I have victory over some situations that have left me feeling defeated.  That I really am ok.... that I'm not wallowing in sadness any longer nor feeling like I "have" to "fix things". This is huge for me, believe me!

At times during my Christian walk, I have wanted to give up.  I have felt defeated.  I know some of you have probably experienced that as well.  During the summer of 2009, I was feeling especially content spiritually, although I was in the midst of a personal/emotional battle regarding something from my past. In other words, I was feeling a little bit defeated in this certain area. I shared some of it with a friend who was there for me at that time.  During the course of the summer and into the autumn, I began to experience real freedom from some tangled strings of my past.  Glory to God!  I was starting to feel victorious in this area.......then.....wham.....some situations occurred to leave me feeling defeated again.  I know that my faith in Christ is not based on feelings.  I was still clinging to Jesus but things that I believed were of God were starting to unravel.  My faith was being tested.  My friendship with one person whom I know the Lord brought into my life was being tested and ....we failed.  I can't go into detail about this situation but....it left me with months of trying to explain my feelings and failing.  Of trying to "fit in" and "fix  things".  And only the Lord can do that.

To make a long story short, I was dealing with a low- level depression and I'd never experienced that kind of sadness before!  It was also making me short-tempered with my family, and leaving me with not wanting to participate in my normal hobbies.  I began to obsess about why this certain friend was not understanding me even though we had been getting close in a spiritual and emotional level.

The Lord prompted me to just start laying things at His feet.  Over this past summer of 2010 I began to do just that.  I started to prayer journal again.  I had stopped, thinking I was no longer hearing from the Lord in this way.  I was so wrong!  I did hear from Him when I took the time to listen!  Slowly, little by little, my spiritual confidence returned. I still miss my friend.  But....the Lord has brought me to a place where I can love and pray and let go of hurts, whether real or perceived.  This is Victory!!

We often go through life with many difficulties thrown  our way.  It's how we respond to those difficulties that test our character.  We have some powerful weapons that God has equipped us with:  the power of prayer.  The power of faith.  Just like the girls needed an adult to go ahead of them up the trail to spur them on, so too, do we need a Guide to go ahead of us.  We need Jesus and He is there, cheering us on, prodding us onward to new heights.  Do we whine?  Sure we do.  But we keep going.  "Count it all joy...."  

The real victory comes when we reach the top of the mountain we had to climb, look around, take a deep breath, and bask in the knowledge that, with faith, we did it.  We overcame a hurdle, an obstacle, a situation that might have left us reeling......but by clinging to Jesus and allowing Him to guide us and heal us, we can move on.  I am not obsessed about what others think.......I will continue to love, pray, and hope for the best.  I will continue to place my faith in the One who brings the Victory to all areas of my life, in all times of my life.  The hard times and the easy times.  The valleys and the mountain top experiences.

 Just like the girls plunged into the clear. cold waters of Caroga Lake after a hot, humid hike, I too, can plunge into the River of Life to revive me, and set me free. 

 And that is true victory!